ing session here. Yesterday I added a "My Type" application on my Facebook page and took the temperament test again. The first time I took it many years ago I was an INFP but the last two times I have taken it over the years I have moved more toward an INFJ. I thought I was always more of a J because I remember going to stores as a child with my mom and straightening up shelves while she shopped. Interestingly enough, after reading this description of an INFJ I realized that I don't need to be blamed for anything - it is just my nature to do that before anyone else does it to me. This is the part of the description that explains that:
INFJs, when scorned, take it personally and retreat inward. They may obsess about the relationship and their role in its failure. One INFJ explained, 'people can do the most outrageous things, yet I blame myself for triggering their behaviour or not recognizing it. I see myself as responsible for relationships. Other people can dismiss them --- I'm not able to.' INFJs may blame themselves and experience a period of mourning. If they do not marshall their resources, externalized their feelings, and take risks to move on, they may experience a long periods of self-examination.
That explains why blaming me and not unpacking the problem together is so devastating to me or any INFJ. I am in mourning - but, hopefully, this reminder will help me not get stalled out here. I took a risk and co-led a staff retreat for St. Raphael Social Services where my sister is an outreach nurse. I thought about backing out of it many times but it felt good to be in front of people again, especially reminding these wonderful people that they are picking up the "servant towel" every day and their lives will be blessed for answering their calling.
2 comments:
I'm glad those temperament tests help some people. It sounds like it's helping you process some things and that is a good thing, of course.
For me, I really feel like the temperament tests don't fit. One thing I've figured out over the years is I was born with one temperament and I believe molded into another. So, I'm kind of rediscovering the "true" me. Deep inside, I'm not much at all like the way most people perceive me. The temperament tests usually end up all over the place for me as I struggle with answering how I feel versus what I do.
Hey Debbie, I'm an INFJ also so I know exactly where you're comming from.
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